Try to read this without laughing out loud . . .
What a wonderful coming together of two diverse groups! We need more
gatherings where the idiot activists are given warm, moist, aromatic
welcomes like this one. This is why PETA usually protests women wearing fur
rather than bikers wearing leather. Sounds to me like the old saying, "you
mess with the bull, and you get the horns". Gee, I guess these characters
thought that Bikers where going to be politically correct like the rest of
the wimpy world.
HERE'S HOW POLICE FOUND ONE OF THEM.
Johnstown, PA (Glossy-News) - Local and state police scoured the hills
outside rural Johnstown, Pennsylvania, after reports of three animal rights
activists going missing after attempting to protest the wearing of leather
at a large motorcycle gang rally this weekend. Two others, previously
reported missing, were discovered by fast food workers "duct taped inside
fast food restaurant dumpsters," according to police officials.
"Something just went wrong," said a still visibly shaken organizer of the
protest. "Something just went horribly, horribly, wrong."The organizer said
a group of concerned animal rights activist groups, "growing tired of
throwing fake blood and shouting profanities at older women wearing leather
or fur coats," decided to protest the annual motorcycle club event "in a
hope to show them our outrage at their wanton use of leather in their
clothing and motor bike seats." "In fact," said the organizer, "motorcycle
gangs are one of the biggest abusers of wearing leather, and we decided it
was high time that we let them know that we disagree with them using it.
Ergo, they should stop."
According to witnesses, protesters arrived at the event in a vintage 1960's
era Volkswagen van and began to pelt the gang members with balloons filled
with red colored water, simulating blood, and shouting "you're murderers" to
passers by. This, evidently, is when the brouhaha began.
"They peed on me!!!" charged one activist. "They grabbed me, said I looked
like I was French, started calling me 'La Trene', and duct taped me to a
tree so they could pee on me all day!"
Still others claimed they were forced to eat hamburgers and hot dogs under
duress. Those who resisted were allegedly held down while several bikers
"farted on their heads."
Police officials declined comments on any leads or arrests due to the
ongoing nature of the investigation; however, organizers for the motorcycle
club rally expressed "surprise" at the allegations.
"That's preposterous," said one high-ranking member of the biker organizing
committee. "We were having a party, and these people showed up and were
very rude to us. They threw things at us, called us names, and tried to
ruin the entire event. So, what did we do? We invited them to the party!
What could be more friendly than that? You know, just because we are all
members of motorcycle clubs does not mean we do not care about
inclusiveness. Personally, I think it shows a lack of character for them to
be saying such nasty things about us after we bent over backwards to make
them feel welcome."
When confronted with the allegations of force-feeding the activist's meat,
using them as ad hoc latrines, leaving them incapacitated in fast food
restaurant dumpsters, and 'farting on their heads,' the organizer declined
to comment in detail. "That's just our secret handshake,"assured the
organizer.
What a wonderful coming together of two diverse groups! We need more
gatherings where the idiot activists are given warm, moist, aromatic
welcomes like this one. This is why PETA usually protests women wearing fur
rather than bikers wearing leather. Sounds to me like the old saying, "you
mess with the bull, and you get the horns". Gee, I guess these characters
thought that Bikers where going to be politically correct like the rest of
the wimpy world.
HERE'S HOW POLICE FOUND ONE OF THEM.
Johnstown, PA (Glossy-News) - Local and state police scoured the hills
outside rural Johnstown, Pennsylvania, after reports of three animal rights
activists going missing after attempting to protest the wearing of leather
at a large motorcycle gang rally this weekend. Two others, previously
reported missing, were discovered by fast food workers "duct taped inside
fast food restaurant dumpsters," according to police officials.
"Something just went wrong," said a still visibly shaken organizer of the
protest. "Something just went horribly, horribly, wrong."The organizer said
a group of concerned animal rights activist groups, "growing tired of
throwing fake blood and shouting profanities at older women wearing leather
or fur coats," decided to protest the annual motorcycle club event "in a
hope to show them our outrage at their wanton use of leather in their
clothing and motor bike seats." "In fact," said the organizer, "motorcycle
gangs are one of the biggest abusers of wearing leather, and we decided it
was high time that we let them know that we disagree with them using it.
Ergo, they should stop."
According to witnesses, protesters arrived at the event in a vintage 1960's
era Volkswagen van and began to pelt the gang members with balloons filled
with red colored water, simulating blood, and shouting "you're murderers" to
passers by. This, evidently, is when the brouhaha began.
"They peed on me!!!" charged one activist. "They grabbed me, said I looked
like I was French, started calling me 'La Trene', and duct taped me to a
tree so they could pee on me all day!"
Still others claimed they were forced to eat hamburgers and hot dogs under
duress. Those who resisted were allegedly held down while several bikers
"farted on their heads."
Police officials declined comments on any leads or arrests due to the
ongoing nature of the investigation; however, organizers for the motorcycle
club rally expressed "surprise" at the allegations.
"That's preposterous," said one high-ranking member of the biker organizing
committee. "We were having a party, and these people showed up and were
very rude to us. They threw things at us, called us names, and tried to
ruin the entire event. So, what did we do? We invited them to the party!
What could be more friendly than that? You know, just because we are all
members of motorcycle clubs does not mean we do not care about
inclusiveness. Personally, I think it shows a lack of character for them to
be saying such nasty things about us after we bent over backwards to make
them feel welcome."
When confronted with the allegations of force-feeding the activist's meat,
using them as ad hoc latrines, leaving them incapacitated in fast food
restaurant dumpsters, and 'farting on their heads,' the organizer declined
to comment in detail. "That's just our secret handshake,"assured the
organizer.
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